When I first heard the news on Facebook, I was shocked and in disbelief. Gradually I uncovered the tale from friends and family; one of my closest friends from home didn't come home from a party, because he fell to his death in a nearby quarry. It seemed like some kind of bad joke, or horrible plot twist from a teen movie. But this is cold hard reality for everyone back in Pennsylvania, and for me too.
I know people are taking Eric Gotwols' death very badly, and everyone has to deal with the tragedy of death in their own way. I've learned to deal with it from when my Dad passed away, from multiple suicide attempts with close friends and family members, and even lately when a friend of mine here in Japan cut herself and I helped clean up the mess. I try to flip the tragedy into comedy, by remembering the good times and consciously recognizing how much we love each other, even if things between us weren't always 'perfect.' Heck, in this case I even chuckled because of the fact that I knew Eric so well, I could just take a guess that he was probably taking a piss and just didn't notice the massive quarry nearby.
I loved Eric so much. I reflect back on having him and all our friends over at my house almost daily to play video games and hang out. He was full of competitive spirit, and would passionately enlighten everyone about the things that he held most dear; sports of all kinds, movies of all genres, video games of all systems, friends from high school and college, his fraturnity TKE, his family, and any Philadelphia sports team. His bold presence commanded attention if you were nearby; I could listen to him go on for hours about sports and not have the slightest idea what he was talking about, but the way he told stories kept me so damn interested that I'd be compelled to ask him more!
Eric inspired me in many ways, and in fact this blog's title "Journey of a Man" was a phrase that he used to describe this very trip to Japan. I was looking forward to sharing my experiences here with him by sharing my personal journal, and especially talking about the baseball game I'll see in Tokyo. I wanted to tell him stories about Japan so fascinating that he would keep asking me more, and perhaps get the itch to travel. Since his passing, the sad fact is that these aspirations of mine are now simply illusions.
We buy into so many illusions in life, and we create them daily. Some people might not want to hear this, but one illusion is that we miss someone. What we really miss is the feeling that someone gave us, what their presence created in us. That longing to see a lost soul and regain that feeling is really just the illusion of separation. When you open your heart with gratitude and remember something awesome about that person, the feeling of their presence will be created right at that moment.
In any case, we're all human and we'll still buy into the drama of a soul departed. It doesn't matter what you believe about what happens to you after you die, whether it's heaven, hell, purgatory, valhalla, reincarnation, sleeping under the dirt, or warming up in the dugout at a baseball game set in the Afterlife Amphitheater (which would be awesome). When somebody you love unexpectedly disappears from your life, the hurt is a wake up call to create a better feeling in your life.
It may take a day, a week, months, or even years to get past the tears of sorrow. But transforming those tears into tears of laughter and joy from memories of the departed at their best keeps the true spirit of that person alive, and it's as if they are still around. I'm sure Eric would be happy to be around so many friends who are laughing and sharing memories about him. He'd be at the center of attention, still!
I personally decided to make myself accountable for my intentions after digesting the reality of Eric's passing. I have been smoking a lot out here in Akita, and I had always intended to quit after college. But I threw out my last pack of Marlboros and gave it up now, in realizing just how short life already is.
Once a year, cherry blossoms brilliantly bloom en masse. Their sight and auroma lift the spirits of a weary passerby, inspiring the joy of life. Just as quickly as they arrive, the white and pink flower petals descend from their high branches and litter the ground. As one walks by, gusts of wind twirl the dancing colors, which evokes the sensation of experiencing mysteries that we do not quite understand. Life and Death coexist, yet The Journey of a Man continues.
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Monday, July 13, 2009
The Future of Gaming
During my time in Japan, I've been doing plenty of research on the games industry via websites and podcasts. Since my ultimate goal is to break in and get my creative juices flowing via game creation, I feel like this is the best way to gain some peripheral career experience. I still have to focus on actually creating games (hopefully after this semester ends, because learning Japanese is really time consuming!), but this research helps me get an idea of what is out there, and what may come beyond the horizon.
Mobile gaming has taken off big time. The Iphone and it's application store, though cluttered with useless junk and seriously in need of quality control, has given game developers a great platform to release high quality games at the low end market price. More importantly, it has extended social gaming away from the stagnant PC screen to the sidewalks of the city and the department stores of suburbia. We could see further implementation of GPS coordinate recognition with future game designs, and the possibility of encoding information into different geographical areas. Imagine: the next zombie game takes place in your home town, and you need to hunt down all the zombies while doing your grocery shopping!
I was thinking about a way to use games to bridge the gap between the young and old generations. When I think about the older generation, I imagine they are confused and maybe afriad of the younger generation's obsession with video games, seeing it merely as a "time waster." With more and more research proving the opposite, it's time to focus on the positive use of games.
Considering that one day I will become an old gamer with deteroirated visual/motor skills, what would I want to play with my kids or grandkids, who DO have the fresh reflexes available? My advantage over the younger generation is not only the 30+ years of gaming experience, but also the decades of world knowledge I will have accumlated. There could be some interesting ways of fusing the Skills of the Young with the Knowledge of the Old. Perhaps a mech game that demands so much of the player, that in fact it requires 2 players to succeed; the younger rides in the cockpit, pilots the mech with their superior motor coordination, and focuses on the micro encounters. Meanwhile, the elder focuses on the macro-war and declares strategies/mission objectives from a real-time updating battlefield scenario so as to affect the larger war at hand.
What about the current elderly population's invlovement in our lives? I think we teenagers/ young adults are sometimes fool ourselves into thinking that "old people are useless" when it comes to play. However, I can remember spending about 3 years watching my Poppop dominate Jeopardy and The Price Is Right from his livingroom couch. His gaming knowledge is actually quite extensive; so why not harness that in conjunction with my advanced hand-eye coordination? I'd love to see a game design that demands both real world knowledge and fine motor skills (and comeon, we can do better than Mario Is Missing).
The Wii has got the right idea with Wii Sports and Wii Fit. Okay, I know it's not an effective means for the 15-35 age group to get into supreme athletic shape, but it has gotten middle aged moms to buy video games for themselves while taking their kids to Gamestop. I'm optimistic here, I think this could be the start of a trend that pulls in the older generation, as well as some gaming skeptics, to buy and play video games with us. I wouldn't be suprised if this becomes the case, since the video game industry is doing very will in our currently recessive economy and still has room for growth.
Once we've converted the elders and skeptics, we can move on to the final step... world domination! MWAHAHAHA!
Mobile gaming has taken off big time. The Iphone and it's application store, though cluttered with useless junk and seriously in need of quality control, has given game developers a great platform to release high quality games at the low end market price. More importantly, it has extended social gaming away from the stagnant PC screen to the sidewalks of the city and the department stores of suburbia. We could see further implementation of GPS coordinate recognition with future game designs, and the possibility of encoding information into different geographical areas. Imagine: the next zombie game takes place in your home town, and you need to hunt down all the zombies while doing your grocery shopping!
I was thinking about a way to use games to bridge the gap between the young and old generations. When I think about the older generation, I imagine they are confused and maybe afriad of the younger generation's obsession with video games, seeing it merely as a "time waster." With more and more research proving the opposite, it's time to focus on the positive use of games.
Considering that one day I will become an old gamer with deteroirated visual/motor skills, what would I want to play with my kids or grandkids, who DO have the fresh reflexes available? My advantage over the younger generation is not only the 30+ years of gaming experience, but also the decades of world knowledge I will have accumlated. There could be some interesting ways of fusing the Skills of the Young with the Knowledge of the Old. Perhaps a mech game that demands so much of the player, that in fact it requires 2 players to succeed; the younger rides in the cockpit, pilots the mech with their superior motor coordination, and focuses on the micro encounters. Meanwhile, the elder focuses on the macro-war and declares strategies/mission objectives from a real-time updating battlefield scenario so as to affect the larger war at hand.
What about the current elderly population's invlovement in our lives? I think we teenagers/ young adults are sometimes fool ourselves into thinking that "old people are useless" when it comes to play. However, I can remember spending about 3 years watching my Poppop dominate Jeopardy and The Price Is Right from his livingroom couch. His gaming knowledge is actually quite extensive; so why not harness that in conjunction with my advanced hand-eye coordination? I'd love to see a game design that demands both real world knowledge and fine motor skills (and comeon, we can do better than Mario Is Missing).
The Wii has got the right idea with Wii Sports and Wii Fit. Okay, I know it's not an effective means for the 15-35 age group to get into supreme athletic shape, but it has gotten middle aged moms to buy video games for themselves while taking their kids to Gamestop. I'm optimistic here, I think this could be the start of a trend that pulls in the older generation, as well as some gaming skeptics, to buy and play video games with us. I wouldn't be suprised if this becomes the case, since the video game industry is doing very will in our currently recessive economy and still has room for growth.
Once we've converted the elders and skeptics, we can move on to the final step... world domination! MWAHAHAHA!
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
BIG UPDATE: Can a Man Explode?
I've heard of human spontaneous combustion, and I surmise a weak postulate: that a man can in fact explode from doing too many things at once. This past week has been fantastic, and I hope you will listen to how fun it has been!
Last Tuesday, I spent ALL of my time in-between classes training in 2 fighting games for the PS3, Soul Calibur 4 and Street Fighter 4. Both of them are amazingly complex, yet I find it more difficult to learn and apply skills in SC4 over SF4 for a few key reasons:
1) Use of 3 dimensions over 2 dimensions
2) Greater number of different button-combinations for techniques
3) Greater amount of characters available to play
Both of them are a challenge to learn, but my years of experience playing Smash Brothers (especially the summer of playing in the House of Pain) have given me the skills in timing, reading attack precedence, and creating mind-games that are easily transferable to these fighting games. Gotta love virtual competition haha.
I've been helping out with the Environment and Ecology Club here by harvesting the leeks, onions, and spinach we planted several weeks ago and selling these vegetables to AIU attendees and affiliates. I also posted some small flyers in the computer lab that had some suggestions to save paper on them. I feel like my "peasant farmer" experience with the EEC, joined with recent knowledge of buying organic vs. buying local, has led me to a personal conviction to renew my membership at the cooperative market in Ithaca and support local farmers. I'm hoping they sell white rice, which is such a great food staple and I hope to cook with it a ton when I move into my apartment at IC this fall. Ah, I can see myself now; riding my badass motobike to the local farmers market and chatting with locals while buying fresh, pesticide-free fruits and vegetables... Okay, kind of dorky but it sounds balanced and good to me haha.
In more JAPAN related news, I spent this past weekend playing with ADORABLE little japanese children! (There is a large chance that I will either marry a japanese woman or adopt a japanese child, either way I'm getting my hands on one!). My fellow students and I introduced ourselves in front of 100 squirming kiddies and their parents on a rainy saturday morning. It was an optional celebration day at the school, and there were games and activities set up all over. I helped out by operating the raffle booth in a flashy orange yukata (robe) and white headband. One kid in particular was wailing and flailing because he wanted one of the prizes, pretty funny to watch actually haha. I brought my own gifts for the little rugrats; sea animal & star stickers, and those little wooden airplanes that you assemble. Not only did I get paid and fed a FANTASTIC set lunch of fried chicken, rice, miso, and salad, but I also took pictures with the stage performers dressed as popular Japanese cartoon characters. The main one is known as Anpanman, and I find it clever marketing that this character is used to sell bread (In the cartoon, he gives his friends power by pulling off his bread-face and giving it to friends).
Last Tuesday, I spent ALL of my time in-between classes training in 2 fighting games for the PS3, Soul Calibur 4 and Street Fighter 4. Both of them are amazingly complex, yet I find it more difficult to learn and apply skills in SC4 over SF4 for a few key reasons:
1) Use of 3 dimensions over 2 dimensions
2) Greater number of different button-combinations for techniques
3) Greater amount of characters available to play
Both of them are a challenge to learn, but my years of experience playing Smash Brothers (especially the summer of playing in the House of Pain) have given me the skills in timing, reading attack precedence, and creating mind-games that are easily transferable to these fighting games. Gotta love virtual competition haha.
I've been helping out with the Environment and Ecology Club here by harvesting the leeks, onions, and spinach we planted several weeks ago and selling these vegetables to AIU attendees and affiliates. I also posted some small flyers in the computer lab that had some suggestions to save paper on them. I feel like my "peasant farmer" experience with the EEC, joined with recent knowledge of buying organic vs. buying local, has led me to a personal conviction to renew my membership at the cooperative market in Ithaca and support local farmers. I'm hoping they sell white rice, which is such a great food staple and I hope to cook with it a ton when I move into my apartment at IC this fall. Ah, I can see myself now; riding my badass motobike to the local farmers market and chatting with locals while buying fresh, pesticide-free fruits and vegetables... Okay, kind of dorky but it sounds balanced and good to me haha.
In more JAPAN related news, I spent this past weekend playing with ADORABLE little japanese children! (There is a large chance that I will either marry a japanese woman or adopt a japanese child, either way I'm getting my hands on one!). My fellow students and I introduced ourselves in front of 100 squirming kiddies and their parents on a rainy saturday morning. It was an optional celebration day at the school, and there were games and activities set up all over. I helped out by operating the raffle booth in a flashy orange yukata (robe) and white headband. One kid in particular was wailing and flailing because he wanted one of the prizes, pretty funny to watch actually haha. I brought my own gifts for the little rugrats; sea animal & star stickers, and those little wooden airplanes that you assemble. Not only did I get paid and fed a FANTASTIC set lunch of fried chicken, rice, miso, and salad, but I also took pictures with the stage performers dressed as popular Japanese cartoon characters. The main one is known as Anpanman, and I find it clever marketing that this character is used to sell bread (In the cartoon, he gives his friends power by pulling off his bread-face and giving it to friends).
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)